THE SPIN AND HIM!

Years ago- when I was just a kid and I was still dating, one of my favorite things to do with the young ladies I went out was take them to the amusement park. It didn't matter whether it was Bertrand’s Island up in Lake Hopatcong or Palisades Park or Great Adventure or the rides up on the boardwalk at Seaside Heights- it was just a great way to get to know each other! Now, you see, I was a little shy back then and when it came to making the first move- well- it would take all the courage that I could muster to even hold a girl’s hand. So I could use all the help that I could get to shall we say- draw the two of us closer together.

It never failed because no matter what park we might have been at- there was always a sure fire ride that would never let me down. Some places called it the Himalaya. Other destinations referred to it as the Music Express or the Rock N Roll or the Silver Streak or the Magnum or even the Orbiter. I wasn’t that concerned about what they called the ride- I just knew what the ride could do for you if you needed a cue to come together!

I would always make sure to sit in a strategic place when we would get in on this adventure because I knew that eventually the speed of the spin was going to sooner or later force the girl to him! Oh she would try to fight it and hold on for dear life so that she wouldn’t end up in my lap- but just as sure as the sun rises each day- it was only a matter of time before there would be a union of wonderful communion! And I played it dumb like I was totally surprised by what was happening before my delighted eyes! Hey I even made a feigned attempt at helping her to stay on her side- but if you can’t beat it you might as well enjoy it and I did!

You see- I had a plan and it was a good plan. It was for the well being of the young lady and not for her calamity. It was a scheme to give her a hope and a future with me. It was designed especially with our togetherness in mind! But I knew that it would take the assistance of some outward circumstances beyond her control that would eventually bring us together!

I can’t help but think that there are times that God works the same way. He desires for the two of us to be closer than we really are but for one reason or another, something always gets in the way. But eventually into every life comes a pace that usually gets us moving much faster than we are accustomed to. And try as we might- we fight it with all that we can but it is no good- we are going to need help. I can't tell you how many times that God has used the spin of outside situations that I couldn't handle to drive me to Him! And what I thought was about to do me in actually got me to land in the lap that I needed to be in! I might have been in over my head but not over the Lord's. Actually the spin drove me to Him and it was there that I realized that I liked being close to God because if we were going to go at a mock speed of a zillion miles an hour- I was now assured that I wasn't going to have to go at it alone!

He had a plan for me and it was His plan not to bring me harm but to bring me a hope and a future and I have learned that there is no real exciting tomorrow without making sure that I am with Him today! Why would I ever want to go at this thrill ride we call life without making sure that God is not only in the car with me- but in the strategic seat where when it all gets crazy- and it will-well I know then that I am going to end up in His lap? There's no place I'd rather be than making sure that it is Jesus and me on every Himalaya ride I see. The spin and Him is more than just a whim- it is a match made in Heaven!

ABIGAIL'S EYES

I was rummaging through some old papers and came upon some words that I wrote shortly after my youngest daughter Abigail Joy was born back in March of 1991. My Abbie has just graduated high school from Middle Township and will soon embark upon college at Philadelphia Biblical University in the fall. She is becoming a remarkable woman in her own right. Genuinely compassionate, steadfast in her convictions, wonderfully talented and spiritedly determined- I have nothing but high hopes for my beloved pumpkin.

When Abbie was three years old- she was diagnosed with kidney cancer and had 8 tumors removed along with one of her kidneys. I will never forget the helplessness I felt as my little angel battled through the chemotherapy and the loss of her hair and the recovery from such a terrible disease. Still, we have been a very fortunate family because Abbie has been cancer free these last 15 years! Through it all, whenever I look at my daughter, I see her with eyes that are grateful and appreciative for every day that we have had with her and a heart that is indebted to God for not taking her away and allowing us the privilege to raise her and be with her all these years. So as my song of praise to God for my not so little girl- I just wanted to share the words that I penned all those years ago when I used to rock Abbie to sleep and be mesmerized by those enchanting brown eyes of hers.

ABIGAIL'S EYES
Does sometimes your life- get all out of view-
and you seem to forget- what's important to you
and if something- doesn't reach you in time-
you just might lose your mind...

Well every day- I know that I must-
get on out in the world- and make a living for us-
But I'm thankful- there's a refuge in sight-
with my family each night...

In Abigail's eyes-
All of the treasures- of life I can see-
like the strong love my wife and my kids give to me-
and God I'm so thankful- that You brighten my skies-
when I look in Abigail's eyes...

I share those words with you today because I felt like it was my way of letting God know how grateful I am that what I felt back then- I still believe even stronger today and I want my baby girl to know how much her father truly adores her. My prayer is that my words will get you to do some sharing of your own!

Never allow a day to go by where you do not get to say or hear the words, "I love you." Do not put off an act of kindness that you know your heart is telling you to do right now. And if God is tapping you on the shoulder- drop everything and give Him your complete attention- because your witnessing a miracle depends upon it. And sometimes that magic is found right in front of your face nestled in the eyes of the ones you love! Here's looking at you kid!

GIVING UP DAISIES FOR REAL LOVE!

All good gifts come from God above- but the will to use them for good must come from us here below. I fear that on any given day we don't even take the time to notice that we have received a very special heavenly present standing in our midst because we allow ourselves to get bogged down by the mistakes of yesterday or too overwhelmed by the unknown concerns of tomorrow. And there stands God with an unopened dated package in His hands that we never even opened because we were looking horizontally for an answer that only comes vertically! And then to add insult to injury, we make matter worse by crying out accusations like "I thought you cared God! How could you leave me here all alone?"

I have suffered for way too long from what some call a "Daisy Petal Christianity." We all remember when gals used to grab a flower in their hand and begin to tear the petals away as they recited, "He loves me- he loves me not... He loves me- he loves me not..." Well I have been guilty of doing that with the circumstances in my life and equating the good times as the times God loved me and the bad times as the seasons that He loved me not! Nothing could be more absurd or further from the truth!
Circumstances make a lousy gauge of revealing to us how God feels about us at any given moment! The world may turn every which way but right- but the one truth that I can clutch on too is to remember that God loves me this morning and today and tonight! And nothing is going to change the fact that God loves you and me! It is an unconditional love that is not based upon our deserving to receive it but upon His decision to release it with no strings attached!

Now when all of life is sunny and sensational- it is much easier to buy into that little ditty. But when life starts throwing you unhittable curve balls and making you look as bad as can be- like you are standing naked at the plate with a toothpick instead of a baseball bat- well let's just say that rolling your eyes at such a statement about God's affections might be standard procedure! Needless to say- there have been many times along the road that I believed that God gave me a defective daisy! The kind of flower that only comes equipped with "He loves me not" appendages!

Some of the low lights of my journey have been Terri's two miscarriages before little Rudy was born. After our son was born, Terri experienced a touch and go pregnancy with our daughter Leah. Our daughter Abbie had kidney cancer at age 3. We had to endure the birth and death of our two boys- Nicholas and Benjamin. My Dad died of cancer at only 67 years of age back in 2000. And just when we thought all the deaths were behind us after the miraculous birth of our son Joel- we had to watch our last baby die on the very day that Rudy graduated from high school... Sure- He loves me!

And then there has been the whole survival of life in the ministry and watching so many so-called colleagues lie to you and lie about you and trying to sabotage you and your ministry. I have had to watch my Terri get crushed by the not so "bright sides" of people. And then most recently in 2007- I had to fight through my body breaking down physically which caused debilitating anxiety attacks that for the most part rendered me practically helpless for almost an entire year. It was in the midst of that spiritual wasteland that I came face to face with the reality that my methods of discerning God's love for me was as flawed as pulling petals from a daisy! His love is not determined by my circumstances. His love is what gives me the ability to not be done in by my circumstances. His love doesn't let me go even when I don't know what the heck might be going on around me- I can know that he is holding all things together from up above me! I needed to put down my daisies and learn how to take my Heavenly daddy at His word!

I have since stopped trying to earn points with a God who is not keeping score. If God is not counting- then why am I? I am loved not because of what I can do for God-but because I have opened up my life to what He has done for me. My Father didn't throw away my scorecard- He just completely filled it out Himself by playing for me the perfect game that I in no way could ever pull off on my own. I can now live my life no longer trying to impress God so I can win His love. I can now live my life already loved- no matter what hits the fan today- He will always be a fan of mine and because of that kind of grace- what would I not want to do not only for Him- but also with Him? Grace means that I stop trying to impress God with my performance and just learn to rest in the truth that it is up to me to just trust His work for me! Too many people make their "good works" their god and miss out knowing the living and loving God in the process! Not me! Not any more!!! I am getting out of God's way so I can be in the highway of His love and mercy and goodness and grace which are constant no matter how messed up everything around me might be today!

Are you messing with daisies when you should be running to Daddy? If you want to leave a lasting legacy with the one life that you now live- then you need to fall in line with the Lord whose love lingers on long after that last petal has hit the ground! Taste and see the true love that the Lord offers and you will never be satisfied with anything less than the real deal ever again!

GRADUATION DAY QUESTIONS!!!

We just experienced the last of three graduation ceremonies in the Sheptock house this year. My son Rudy graduated from college in May and is now presently working with us in the youth ministry at The Lighthouse Church. My youngest son Joel just graduated from kindergarten last week and I keep telling him that he needs to get a job now- but all he does is smile back at me! And last- but definitely not least- my youngest daughter Abbie Joy just kissed her high school days goodbye as she got her diploma firmly in hand just last night from Middle Township. All these milestones make me wonder about this very pointed question: "Is who I am today- who I dreamed I would become- all those years ago?" Now before I get to that question- I'd like to share a couple of lessons that I have learned along the way in my now almost 50 years of life on this planet!

I have learned that life happens whether you are ready or not and if you aren't careful- the only result of getting involved in a rat race is that you could very well end up becoming a rat! I have also learned that we don't do very well living fully in the present. What happens all to often to way too many of us is that we are either bogged down by a past event that tends to paralyze us from getting back up and moving on or we get overwhelmed by a frightening tomorrow that has the tendency to steal the joy right out from under us today! And in the midst of trying to repair our yesterdays and attempting to desperately control an uncontrollable future- we miss the present "present" that this very day is! Did I unwrap today yet as the gift that it is? You can't wait until later to do it for if you do it too late- you miss it!

I have also learned that this world tries to get you to conform rather than be transformed. I know personally that it takes a true commitment to your heart to stay the course and really be the person that you know deep down inside that God created you to be. There is a difference between unity and uniformity. There is a huge difference between fitting in and selling out. What I mean by that is that when you take a closer look- isn't it funny that God created us humans to be as unique as snowflakes and rather than discovering the freedom that occurs when we are the people we were meant to be- we settle back in to become like everybody else? It almost makes you want to sing another chorus of "Send In The Clones!" God is the author of diversity. He never intended we humans to be a "one size fits all" breed. And yet how often do we "laugh alike and walk alike and at times we even talk alike???" I think we can lose our minds and dare I say- even our souls-when humans are too much of a kind! All I know is that in my journey since graduation days- it has been a fight to just stay true to the me that God intended me to be when He planned for this Rudy- all those years ago! How about you? Are you truly being you when you face each and every day? Or do you ever find yourself looking in the mirror attempting to rediscover the you that the years of living have covered? Do you know that everyday you choose to hide your light under a bushel- everybody loses?

Now back to my initial question: Is who I am today- who I dreamed I would be when I walked across the stage to graduate back in 1978? And I have come to the conclusion that since I had no idea what I was in for back then- and in turn no way to properly determine what a grown up- mature- well weathered Rudy should really look and be like- I think the better question is: "Who have I become today?"

I loved Jesus back then and I've got say that He is still the number one reason that I get out of bed every day! I am not just surviving- but truly living in the midst of it all! My life has not been a bed of sunshine, lollipops and roses! Many times it has resembled a train wreck more than a well primped garden, but God has never abandoned me even when others did. And He has kept His promise to be with me to the end- and since this isn't the end yet- He and me are still together and going strong! I am so glad that me and Jesus have a forever thing!

I was creative and imaginative back then and last I checked both of those qualities are still in tact and being well implemented! Of all the nations that I have ever been to- the imagination is still my favorite destination! I wanted to be a husband and a father and I have been blessed with a beautiful wife that I really don't deserve and some pretty awesome children that make this Papa proud! I wanted to use my life to tell as many as possible as effectively and excellently as possible about the difference the presence of God makes in a life and the need for everyone to possess genuine faith and lasting relationships! The last I checked- that is still something that I long for and get energized by doing! It still is pretty hard to shut me up once you get me going!

All in all I guess what I am trying to say is that while no life can be mapped out at 5 or 18 or 22 years of age- I do believe that life is an eternal classroom and the learning never ends and the most important tool in your pencil box when you sit at your desk is that you prepare to always tackle all of life lesson's staying true to the you that you know God made you to be!!! Every time you try to be somebody else to please somebody else to become somebody else- you miss it! Too many people are working way too hard at a job they hate to please people they don't really like that only results in misery and the lyrics to the next biggest heartbreak country song! You get one shot at this thing called life and since you are going to have to give an answer for every opportunity that you have been given- you might as well go at it singing the song that God meant for you to belt out! Get in the batters box and go at it swinging not trying to be David Wright- but just you do it right! Because when you get right down to it- the only graduation that matters most- is the one that you will face when you leave this world behind! And you don't want to blame your mistakes on any pomp or circumstances then! If God loves you- then you might as well give being you a true try! Something tells me we will all be better off if you do!

IF TODAY WAS MY LAST DAY!

I am preaching a series of sermons on Sundays in June at The Lighthouse Church called "One Month To Live." Besides its thoughts coming from the pages of the Bible-the theme of my messages is based on a book out that has become a New York Times best seller that encourages its readers to face their own mortality and live life to the fullest. Many churches across America are talking about the same thing! What would you do if you knew you had one month to live? How and would you live any differently than you are now? And if you would do it then- why don't you do it now- before it becomes a crisis or wait until it is too late?

As I have been preparing for these talks, my mind has been filled with a myriad of questions, reflections and perspectives. Today I probably will ask more than answer. I intend to stir more than settle. My humble desire is to get everyone who reads this to make a conscious decision to engage in the day that is before us now and to stop being paralyzed by a past that none of us can change or frightened by a future that none of us have control over! But here is something that every one of us can do something about and that has to do with what we will do with TODAY!

If today was my last day would I want to surround myself in the company with the money that I could have saved if I switched to Geico or would I rather be with the people that I love? Are the words that are truly in my heart getting to the point where they come out of my mouth to the ears that really need to hear them while they can? I might know that God loves me but have I told Him lately how much I love Him? When was the last time I actually did something today rather than saving it for the quite obscure someday? Is my pride literally getting in the way of allowing my feelings to come through loud and clear?

If today was my last day wouldn't I long to say "I love you" to as many as I can as often as I can? Wouldn't I rather go out fishing with my pals in the open air than fight with them in a stuffy office? Would I play catch with my boys? Would I tell my daughters how much I delight in them? Would I walk with my wife a little longer and let my kiss linger well beyond the quick obligatory peck on the cheek?

And what about giving forgiveness a chance to rid my spirit of any loitering poisonous bitterness? Wouldn't I rather pray now than pay later? Am I hoarding something that I should be giving away now while I can rather than wrapping my arms around something I can't take with me anyway? And why would I want to send flowers to a body that can't appreciate it when the same gesture could light up some body's life tonight?

If today was my last day would I finally wear and use and do those things that I've been saving for much too long for that special occasion? What constitutes a special occasion anyway? How many occasions go by that we didn't even realize were special until after the fact? When will we realize that if we dwell too long in the past and wander too far into the future- we have no chance to receive the gifts that are the present?

Listen to me! Look at me! Do you hear me? Do you see me? Will you slow down so you can notice? Can you put down your work for a minute? Wouldn't you do so if you knew you only had an hour left to live? Or would you work your laptop, your blackberry and your i-phone right up until the very last second attempting to hold on to and pull strings that are way beyond your grasp? Is your business something that should be none of your business? And what matters most when it comes to the most that matters?

I long to live everyday like it was my last day. I know it sounds trite, but it truly is my goal. I long to start and begin each day by pledging my dependence upon God for I have come to know personally and experientially that there is no life apart from knowing and being with Him. I long to move and breathe and operate in such the way that everyone who knows me will understand that I regard relationships as the reason that I am here! I don't use people to accomplish projects! Projects are just a great way to work with and be with people! I am not into making my life a soliloquy. This is not a solo act- it is a company of family!

If today was my last day- then I want my life to shout out that to be loved and to love was why I was here. How I do in that department will determine whether my life was just spent is a daze or whether my days were invested into a life!

I close today with some quotes from Professor Morrie Schwartz who was the subject of that wonderful book "Tuesdays with Morrie..." He said
"So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning..."
"The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love and to let love come in."

Love God and love one another and make sure you unwrap each day as the precious gift that it is- and if this is your last day-go out with a big bang that will still make noise into eternity!!! Shalom!